This is the diary of a fat girl in Nairobi – Ep 2

BY LILLYAN LUTTAH aka BLACC MERCEDES
When you think about a fat girl you cannot imagine what emotional stress I undergo. Some might think it is not such a big deal.
I have to use a public transport to work every day and seat close to the door so that I do not have to stress about moving in between seats that have been structures for tiny people.
People   look at you like the only thing you can achieve is eating food, being a fashion lover and some of the beautiful trends have to pass me by. I love clothes that are only up to size 12 yet I am a size 18. I have to deal with the pressure of having a particular fashion in the name of hiding the shame of being fat.
Rumor has it that if one wears black clothes they seem tiny;90 per cent of all my clothes are black, blue or grey so that I do not draw attention. It is depressing; when I hang out with my buddies I look like a mum.
My weight turned me into a zombie. If I am not going to work, I will not go anywhere because it makes me feel unequal to others and nearing death.
Without motivation and drive I cannot go too far in achieving my goals.” I can freely say I have tried slimming pills, gym; jogging, running; but still growing big”. I need help I do not want to be mocked. “Is there a way that I can be helped? I need a lasting solution”